Maiden Over…..

Post Women’s day, a thought did cross my mind, that why do girls prefer to write their Full name as Name, Maiden Surname and Surname after marriage now a days including me. I was thinking, why would I prefer to keep it that way? So many girls have similar surnames, some don’t even change their maiden surnames, be it because it’s there on all official records, school certificates, ration card, pride, etc. There were sub-thoughts which were crossing my mind at the same time….My mind has taken a lot of time and effort to do the thinking, the least you can do is read! 😉 Thanks for that! So, I went through a lot of haphazard feelings. In my case we are two sisters, we don’t have a brother, who will carry my maiden last name forward!? Entering this precinct I have lost a night’s sleep really! It could be a big thing for someone, or may not even be a tiny speck of an issue at all!
When I fell in love, I even tried signing or writing my name out of curiosity! Then there is this fear or acceptance from the other family, and sometimes, you want to keep everyone happy so you strive to keep both families on the same ground, but it happens that you end up upsetting one or the other…..! I guess that is the only reason for me to some girls are proud of their maiden names, some are embarrassed about their weird surnames after marriage, the adopted surnames are sometimes too long, too funny, too complicated! There are so many interlinked things with the married surname that I wouldn’t want to stir up a storm! But for me, I know for a fact, that I am very close to my family. I can never imagine my life without them. And I am as sure about the other three as well, My mom, dad and sister can’t live without each other too. This may or may not prove anything. But the love that we have for the immediate family, the same intensity is such a distant goal to achieve when it comes to the new family you are married into….This love has to be earned by each and every member in the family. This does not automatically exist in the blood. It has to be built through trust and love. That is the foundation of the new family and communication is the key to unlock the barriers between two families who need to come together as a one big joint family…..God bless all the girls who are to get married and experience a re-birth, and those girls who want to make it like me….to strike a balance…. 🙂


2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. pranjali
    Jul 15, 2011 @ 05:25:01

    Dear Poornima , really marriage means a lot to us. I would like to take it positively in case you are worrying about who will carry the maiden name in your case….. You know this only thought make the life of many woman a tragedy. This only Thought is taking life of many girls before entering into this world.

    We can come up with a new thouth : we can carry our parents blessing , their didactical thoughts , and family values.

    there is a need for change , a change in our thoughts so, lets come up with a new thouth NO difference it makes whether – Poornima or Poornima Pandit-Pullan.

    let’s move a step ahead towards melioration.

    – Regards,


    • poohalicious
      Jul 18, 2011 @ 06:13:46

      Thank you for the comment Pranjali! 🙂

      That is why secretly I wish that the society obliterates these old traditions and gives enough freedom to women to choose what they want!


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