Where should I start…

Believe me, I am completely clueless as to why I cannot be consistent, be it writing, studying, or finding something I really love and honestly I love writing but since dad passed away I fall short of words. It is like learning to read and write again, life just seemed to stop even when it did not stop in reality. My imagination has been limited. Although my recent visit to India has put me back on track somehow, no wonder I am writing this now! Where should I start now? Have people in my life changed? Not really. Have times changed? Yes, drastically. In this world of technology, people care more on Whatsapp, Twitter and Facebook,than in reality. More of pings, pokes, emoticons, expressing in limited characters when life should be more of talking, seeing reactions with your own eyes, but somehow everyone is comfortable with what is going on…be it politics, religion, terrorism, violence, chores, jobs, everything is so peaceful in a disturbing way. Selfies are more common and selfishness is the need of the day!

I feel lost sometimes in all of this, feel that somehow I don’t belong to this age, that I should take birth again in the days where air was pollution free, vehicles were not so common, public transport was used more, mother nature was adored and glorified, religion was more bearable because not everyone objected, only a few were opinionated and we called them arrogant and ignored them. We were great kids to our parents, not demanding at all compared to the kids today. Our parents were also patient and not agitated and never handed over electronic devices for us to let them have their moment. They would include us in their moments. Cameras were only to capture special moments not daily life. Music and movies were only limited to entertain and not for skin show.We never regarded young girls as flesh, even when they were bare bodied as toddlers, it was like Adam and Eve until they ate the forbidden fruit, now everyone wants them to be covered up because they might fall prey to sinful organs. There were not as many chemicals, pesticides in the food that we ate, there was less of advertisement and more of trying stuff out. Makeup was only limited to celebrities now it hard to distinguish between an average person and a celebrity. Life was much simpler when people were harmoniously living with nature. To adjust to this demanding life, make sense and to find myself will take time, patience and consistency.

Can I stop growing up now?


Right now I am going through the same emotions when I was 19 years old and it’s a difficult stage to be in because you’re just completing 19 moving on to 20 and things start to look completely different because you’re moving out of your teens. You won’t be treated as a child anymore. 18 is classified as an adult age but 19 is the ‘growing into an adult’ year. You can continue doing fun things, naughty things and get away with it. You are attracted to the opposite gender at this age, instead of fighting and arguing you are always conscious about your looks and dressing. You are going through the worst acne phase or the completely opposite best hair and clear face phase. You have more friends to have more coffee and even more gossips. You are constantly rebelling and making your own rules. Your thumbs are the  strongest at this age because you text so much! You tend to slam every door, the refrigerator, the door to your room, the door to cars, taxis, buses, bathrooms. You are so on the edge of always crying or getting upset and angry. You hate your parents at times, of-course you regret saying you hated your parents in your 20s. But the year of being 19 is completely different from any other age of the teenage years or growing up in the 20s. What in the world….I can even compare the two decades!!!! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa……

Moving out of my teens was so difficult I almost cried as I sulked going into the twenties. I cried because I felt all the fun was over,I  was supposed to become a responsible person,pick up a job finish my studies,get married,settle down basically move on in life and being a Cancerian I tend to hold onto a lot of things including my age. 20’s was smooth sailing, and I have almost achieved everything I had to by the social and cultural demands. The reason I didn’t want to move on and grow up was because I felt like I’m getting too old too fast and now its a similar feeling.Its a feeling of something new is on it’s way, the anticipation of  good or bad, losing, being scared of not accomplishing anything anymore in life. I’m soon stepping into a completely new generation…the 30’s. https://poohalicious.wordpress.com/How would it be? Would it be overwhelming? I know I am childish at times would people laugh at me, mock me for being childish at this age? I’ve already found two gray hair would I find more, do I have to use anti aging creams now? There are creams to make you look 10 years younger, but any creams or lotions or anything to make me feel 10 years younger? Or any magical spells like..would this one work…Ho, hum, high and low, can I magically stop to grow? In the 20s moved on from pop to Rock, now would it be the blues that take me through the day? Do I really have to age and act wise and give free advice for the age appropriate experiences?

Terrible….well another year and the wine gets old….Happy Birthday to me!

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